Metaphysical Stuff 15
The Network of Stolen Consciousness Part I
by Beth Goobie
I am a survivor of intelligence cults that operate across Canada and
are connected internationally. In 1959, I was born into an
intergenerational CIA-connected cult that continues to operate in
central Ontario. I was first subjected to calculated torture sessions
in the womb, and have been able to integrate fetal selves as an
adult. I was an experienced dissociater at birth, an accomplished
prostitute before kindergarten, and was being circulated on an elite
international circuit by grade school.
My programming involved fragmentation into alters who were trained as
sex agents, couriers, computers, and cult alters (priestess, seeker,
caller, whore, slave, trainer, etc.). Some of my alters were trained
to handle weapons. The stories of Kathleen Sullivan, Brice Taylor,
Cisco Wheeler, and Claudia Mullen, as well as Cathy O'Brien's
TranceFormation of America describe much that is familiar to me,
including near-death centers and `hunting.' I would like to thank
each of these women for speaking out. I deeply admire your courage.
Keep going.
My perspective differs somewhat from the women mentioned above in
that I have experienced a great deal, both personally and through
recovered memory, of the metaphysical. I do not believe occult
ceremonies are based solely on superstition and programming. It is my
understanding that both cults and the intelligence network are
developing the technology to exploit the metaphysical realities that
are a daily part of all our lives, and that they intend to use these
metaphysical realities to fragment and radically realign the
consciousness of the average citizen for purposes of `mind control'
and to `feed' off the energy of each individual life. I would like to
discuss this as a complex process that aligns the brain to specific
frequencies, then uses calculated trauma and dissociation to force
interaction with the metaphysical. This interaction is then
programmed for specific purposes by the intelligence community.
First, however, I think it important to note the basic motivation
that drives mystery cults to perpetrate their heinous illegal
activities: the desire to live forever. In search of immortality,
cults have always explored metaphysical gateways to alternate
dimensions that can be opened through traumatic dissociation. These
out-of-body experiences teach cult members to exist as frequencies;
conscious knowing energy that has been dissociated from the body
during trauma. One can leave the body at many different frequencies,
and each frequency opens up a different dimension of reality
or `mystery,' as well as interaction with the entities which inhabit
these dimensions.
Members of mystery cults have also learned to exploit the human
energy of others as `feed,' extending their own longevity within the
body. They have learned to transmit more and more of their
consciousness into alternate dimensions (some are called Heaven,
Hell, the Mysteries, etc.), where their `spirits' will live after
their bodies die, so that they are `storing up their treasures' not
on earth, but in alternate `spiritual' realities. These
dissociated `spirits' are composed of energy and continue to exist
only as long as they are `fed' through the kill energy of human
sacrifice. If not, they fade as all energy fades, because human
beings are not meant to live forever.
It is my understanding that the intelligence community has been
developing the technology to explore and facilitate this process.
While their goals are much more complex than the desire for
immortality, this is one of the many different aspects of
consciousness which they have been attempting to technologize and
control. Everything that they eventually accomplish, however, begins
with the process of dissociation.
Dissociation is commonly experienced during trauma. Rape and traffic
accident survivors describe out-of-body experiences during which they
float above their bodies and watch terrifying activities transpire
below. This experience occurs naturally, whether the actual trauma is
a fluke occurrence or a calculated torture session. What I have come
to understand, based on a decade of recovery, is that the traumatized
mind of a young child doesn't just send itself upward to escape. It
can dissociate in one or all six directions simultaneously. As I grew
older, the number of escape routes into which my mind projected
itself increased into the hundreds, even thousands, but to a very
young mind, there are only six immediate directions to leave the
body, and this is the reason the number six is basic to cult primary
programming.
After consciousness projects itself out-of-body to escape trauma, it
continues to exist. A dissociated fragment of consciousness (an
alter) can watch and think, remember and record what is happening to
her body as she hovers above, beside or below it. (Many survivors can
remember a single torture session from several out-of-body
perspectives. These tend to be less affected by pain, shock, drugs or
virtual reality headsets because they no longer reside within the
body. This is the source of the majority of recovered memories �
dissociated alters who have been projected out-of-body.) When the
trauma ends, and the body is free from pain and fear, these fragments
of consciousness will probably return to it. If the incident of
pain/fear is not repeated, the dissociated fragments of consciousness
will most likely merge with core consciousness and there will be no
long-term loss of memory.
The reason most people commonly remember dissociating upward during
trauma is because Up is the easiest out-of-body dimension to recall.
The human body naturally lives within many interactive dimensions of
reality, but Western society has programmed the individual to limit
consciousness to the small fragment of reality we commonly call `the
real world.' Many people who dissociate and have an out-of-body
experience will describe a great deal of activity going on `around'
us. The term `Around' is a common cult trigger that refers to
alternate dimensions, and it is frequently used to trigger an
individual into sending a programmed fragment of consciousness (an
alter) out-of-body, in order to initiate interaction that exists at a
frequency outside `real world' consciousness.
We are electric beings. Consciousness is a form of energy that is
naturally coded into many different frequencies. These frequencies of
consciousness align with the many alternate dimensions of reality we
live within. Thus out-of-body states can occur at many different
frequencies of consciousness. When consciousness leaves the body, it
becomes a form of energy, a set of brain waves that has been
projected outward. This energy, or brain frequency, can change as it
travels. Consciousness that is projected upward leaves the body as
quick warm vibrations. As consciousness travels upward, the
vibrations quicken and grow warmer, the colors of the vibrations
change from pastels to white light, and sounds are emitted at higher
and higher pitches. The dimensions through which this projected
consciousness travels also correspond to these changing frequencies.
I clearly recall ECT torture sessions at a doctor's office in which I
was told by the doctor to send myself upward. Before the electric
shock was applied, I would be told a story about the dimension in
which I was supposed to relocate after I left my body. For example:
"Up Up Up is a land of angels," he (the doctor) says. "It's a land
where everything is white and clean. The angels are friendly and they
sing happy songs. They play harps and sit on clouds. There are many
white crosses there. When you go to Up Up Up, you'll be happy. There
will be no devils and there will be no dark." (The Only-Good Heart,
Goobie, p. 45)
As electric shock was applied to send me upward, a carefully
choreographed scenario would often take place around me. For example,
a man dressed as a devil might come running into the doctor's office:
"Then the door to the Operating Room bursts open and a devil comes
in. A devil all dressed in black with horns on his head. The nurse
screams, waving her hands. `Gotcha,' the devil yells at me. `Gotcha,
Dorell. Gotcha.' I'm jerking from the electricity so I can't watch
the devil jump all around me with his pitchfork. The doctor keeps
sayinig, `Up Up Up.' It starts to happen. As if I'm a white sheet
pinned to a clothesline and the clothes pins come loose and a wind
picks the sheet up slow, lifting me higher and higher, away from
where I'm tied down, away from the electricity. Now, it doesn't hurt
no more. It's easy, I lift into Up where I been lots of times. (The
Only-Good Heart, p. 45)
As I traveled upward, I found myself passing through levels of out-of-
body consciousness. The first level, which I was taught to call `Up,'
existed just under the office ceiling. There I was able to float free
of pain and fear, and watch as the doctor and nurse applied further
electric shock to my pre-school body on the table below. However, I
wasn't alone as I floated in `Up' and watched my body � other
dissociated fragments of consciousness were floating there with me.
One belonged to the doctor, one to the nurse, one to the man dressed
as a devil, and there were several who looked like me and seemed to
live there permanently; each of them watched what was taking place
below. When they talked to each other, their voices were slightly
higher than normal.
As more electric shock was applied to my body, I traveled further
upward, passing through the ceiling into the next level which was
called `Up Up' � a sky-blue dimension full of dissociated fragments
of consciousness belonging to familiar and unfamiliar people, all of
them floating peacefully. These fragments looked like human bodies
but had a spirit-like quality, and their voices were slightly higher
and faster than voices in `Up.' The next dimension, `Up Up Up,'
existed at a white-light frequency that was also peaceful and
populated with human-looking high-voiced angels, some of whom looked
like me. However the level above this was a dimension of `pure white
fire' and extremely difficult to endure. The white figures
of `angels' could be seen traveling up and down from this level,
which was called `God,' a collective dimension of the projected
psychic energy of electric shock.
In later ECT torture sessions, I traveled past `God' into dimensions
of outer space where I floated among stars and planets. Again, I
found other fragments of human consciousness in these dimensions,
though not as many. The doctor who controlled the ECT sessions
programmed my out-of-body consciousness to return to my body when a
specific tactile trigger was applied to my body. When I returned, he
would have me report everything I had seen and experienced while
traveling out-of-body. Gradually I realized he couldn't, or wouldn't,
travel as far as I did, either because he didn't want to experience
the level of electric shock it took to dissociate that far, or
because he was unable to project psychically as far as I was.
I learned that the immediate dimensions surrounding me could change,
depending on the room I was in and the people in the room with me.
However, these dimensions remained collective and interactive � they
could be entered by anyone who `tuned into' them. A few of these
upward dimensions had specific names such as Heaven, Seventh Heaven,
Paradise, City of God, the Emerald City, or Narnia. Many involved
flying unicorns, butterflies or rainbows, as well as settings from
children's books and television shows.
I also experienced torture sessions in cold dark rooms that often
involved being hung upside-down or placed inside coffins. I would be
ordered to `go Down' � i.e., project my consciousness downward. The
mind travels downward in slow dark frequencies that commonly trigger
interaction with psychic dimensions of graveyards, tunnels, caves,
demons, vampires or ghosts. These dimensions are as interactive as
white-light dimensions � i.e., dissociated fragments of human
consciousness already inhabit these levels, taking the forms of
vampires or demons, just as they took on the forms of spirits and
angels in the white-light dimensions.
It has been my experience that avoiding the typical value judgements
placed on dark and light psychic realities is essential to healing.
These dimensions are about frequencies of consciousness, not good and
evil. They exist naturally, but are exploited by cults as a method
of `storing' memory and consciousness as an energy source that the
cult elite and non-human entities then feed upon. In order to
accomplish this, cults carefully split and regulate a young
child's `in-body' and 'out-of-body' awareness, through the
fragmentation and storage of consciousness in polarized dimensions
such as Up and Down, Heaven and Hell, castles on the clouds and
graveyards.
Cults have always used trauma-based programming to force their
members to send fragments of consciousness into aligned dimensions.
In the sixties, intelligence cults became the guinea pigs for the
technology that was being developed to enhance and control this
process. The intelligence community was learning as it experimented,
and the early stages were extremely blunt-edged, the goal being the
creation of a quick and reliable dissociative response in the child
through calculated episodes of trauma. The basic lesson a child had
to learn was that it was preferable to exist not in the body, but in
the psychic out-of-body dimensions of the mind. As an infant, I was
often left in a brightly-lit cold room for long periods, naked, lying
in my own feces and urine, while tape-recorded sounds such as
grinding gears were played at a loud volume. My infant selves learned
to respond as intended:
"And I know wanting. Wanting, wanting. I overflow my skin with sobs,
wails I send out in search of mother hands, mother voice. Rooted in
heart and the tips of nerves, a tiny longing energy floats around me.
Against this, the huge grinding noise cuts deeper. The Body opens
into a raw red wound. The longing released. Vague baby shape,
transparent as a wish, the longing hovers a moment over the three-day-
old infant's Body spread naked and wailing, then drifts around the
room. Wishing mother hands, wishing mother voice. The open doorway,
too far for The Body's eyes to bring into focus, comes close-up into
the longing's gaze. This is the first door: escape from grinding
sound, burning skin, the overwhelming light. Through the doorway into
a hallway, immediately shadowed, the horror of sound and light placed
further back. Lost, the longing drifts in the upper hallway where
every other door is closed, then floats down the long stairwell of
the old house to the first floor. There are different sounds at the
end of this hall and the longing travels through another open doorway
into a large white kitchen. Here a woman stands at a stove cooking
soup." (The Only-Good Heart, p. 19)
As I grew older, I was frequently gagged and tied in my highchair,
then left for hours. After I had stopped struggling to gain attention
and was slumped unresponsively with glazed eyes, I would be fed and
bathed, but only after I had learned that in the body I was nothing,
I did not exist, no one would respond to me or love me. What I soon
discovered, however, was that if I left my body and projected upward,
a loving out-of-body version of my mother was waiting in `Up' to care
for me there. Very quickly I learned that mother-love, human love,
and God's love all existed upward, out-of-body in the `spirit' world.
To further ingrain this lesson, my abusers maintained a constant
assault on my body that took many forms � emotional, physical and
sexual abuse, immersion in water, spinning, heat and cold, flashing
lights, and loud sounds. Pins and needles were inserted into my skin
and genitals in specific patterns that correlated with acupuncture
and acupressure techniques. Often the torture was over-stimulation.
One ritual involved many robed people standing around me, each
rubbing a fingertip in a gentle circle on my skin. Fingers were also
inserted into my mouth and vagina. Voices would whisper different
messages into each ear at different speeds and pitches. To escape the
confusion and over-stimulation, I learned to use the circling motion
each fingertip left on my skin as a gate, and to leave my body
simultaneously through each one.
Programming to fragment my spatial perception enhanced the
dissociative process. In one scenario, I would be told to take a step
to the right. As I took this step, my trainer would snap his fingers,
creating an auditory break in consciousness. Then I was told my name
had become `Rightie.' When ordered to take a step to the left, my
name became `Leftie.' Pushed to the floor, I was given the
name `Downie'. There was also an `Uppie,' a `Backie,' and
a `Frontie.' Predictably, Rightie, Uppie and Frontie had positive
experiences, while Leftie, Downie and Backie had negative ones. (The
polarized good-bad functions of the six directions were reinforced in
many different ways. For instance, I was often told that if I turned
around inside my head, threw my bad memories into the dark, then
turned around to the front and opened my eyes to see the light, the
bad memories would be gone.) Electric shock was added to the finger
snap, increasing the break in consciousness, until these
six `direction' alters were divided from my in-body consciousness by
a wall of energy composed of electric-shock, pain, and fear.
All six of these alters continued to exist outside my body,
in `Around.' This meant that `Beth,' who lived inside my body, had a
reduced awareness of her immediate surroundings, because part of her
consciousness had been pulled outside her. If someone snapped his
fingers and said "Right," `Beth' would step to the right, fade out,
and the alter `Rightie' would take over the body. `Rightie' had no
awareness of `Beth' or what went on in the body when `Beth' inhabited
it. As this program was expanded to create further alters who lived
two steps out from the body, then three, more and more of my
consciousness was pulled out-of-body into `Around,' and my spatial
perception grew more confused. Even as an adult, identifying east or
west, right or left, took careful thinking on my part, well into my
recovery process.
Once a child's spatial perception has been carefully fragmented and
pulled out-of-body, it becomes relatively easy to trigger switches in
consciousness within the body. The child gradually reaches a point
where she switches every time she changes physical direction � for
instance, every time the body shifts to the left or right while
playing tag on the playground, switches in consciousness are
occurring, so that there is a constant blur of memory and focus. As a
result, the child grows more confused, less self-reliant, and more
responsive to external demands. This breakdown in spatial perception
also enhances other types of switch programming that rely on physical
realities, such as rainbow programming.
As a small child, I was taken to the foot of a large rainbow that had
tracks running over it much like a midway ride. My birth parents
would say goodbye to me and place me in the cart. The cart would
physically take me `over the rainbow.' On the other side, a different
family stood waiting. They told me they were my new family and gave
me a new name. While I lived with this new family (which might be as
little as half a day), my birth family was never mentioned, and I was
programmed for a new series of tasks. Once this had been
accomplished, I would be returned `over the rainbow' to my birth
parents.
As the rainbow was used as a physical bridge of amnesia between more
and more realities, it translated into verbal and visual cues. If I
happened to remember something that belonged to another reality and
mentioned it, my mother would quickly say, "That's over the rainbow,
Beth," and I would be triggered to `forget' or dissociate that
consciousness. Soon I simply had to be shown a picture of a rainbow
and I would `forget' one reality and switch to another. (These
rainbows could also be black and white, upside-down, or come in
different color patterns.) Greeting cards that display rainbows are
frequently used to reinforce `forgetting.'
An intelligence cult member is also programmed to `forget' or
displace memory through common activities such as sweeping,
shoveling, cleaning, throwing out the garbage, bathing, eating
(poisoning the memories), and closing doors. External sounds, such as
ticking on the wall, will trigger a shift in consciousness. For
instance, a ticking on the wall to one's left will activate an out-of-
body alter which exists to the left of the body. Modern technology
can cause ticking sounds on a wall from a remote location, so that
thousands of ticking sounds can be heard coming from every wall in a
room simultaneously. This is an effective scatter/scramble program,
intended to disorient the victim. The term `ticketyboo' is a common
verbal trigger used to fragment and scatter consciousness.
As my physical reality became more fragmented and my consciousness
was pulled more and more into `Around,' I learned to dissociate
quickly and reliably. Since my `trainers' wanted to control my `out-
of-body' alters as well as my `in-body' consciousness, they needed to
program me to store memory fragments and alters in calculated
structures. (Note: Forgetting is not losing memory, it is a storage
process.) A basic storage structure frequently mentioned by survivors
is the matrix, or derivatives thereof, such as the acrostic. A child
will be shown a basic tic-tac-toe matrix, wherein each square has a
number or letter, and told to store an alter in each square. An
alternative to this is a hallway of color-coded doors with a room for
each alter, or a dungeon with cells. These structures are layered
according to frequencies � the more pain or trauma that is applied to
the body, the further `out-of-body' the hallway or matrix into which
the alter will project itself to `live.'
The cross in the circle is one of the most basic storage structures.
Each section is known as a quadrant. The two upper quadrants store
alters at a white-light frequency. The upper right side stores alters
at positive `happy' frequencies, the left side stores white-light
alters traumatized by electric shock, or pins and needles (etc.). The
lower half stores alters at dark frequencies, the left
quadrant `keeping' the traumatized frequencies, the right
quadrant `keeping' the positive ones. Cults, and society in general,
constantly program us to limit our consciousness to the upper right
quadrant (i.e., right=light=good=happy) and the lower left quadrant
(i.e., left=dark=bad=terror). Common cult triggers link phrases such
as `good people,' `children of light,' `path of light,' and Christian
terminology. Healing involves exploring the positive power of the
dark as well as the trauma stored in one's white-light frequencies,
and dissolving the cross.
Another basic storage structure is `star programming.' Beginning in
early childhood, electric shock was applied to my genitals to
create `stars selves,' which would then be arranged in
constellations, even entire universes. I was usually prepared through
a careful series of triggers. As I lay in my bed at bedtime, my
father would tell me, "If you see Daddy tonight, it's just a dream."
Then he would say, "You are rising, little Beth, lifting up out of
your body. Keep going straight up. Up, go Up, and there you will find
a room just like this one, with a bed just like this one. Now climb
into that bed and go to sleep up there."
As I had been programmed to dissociate on verbal cue, I would lift
out of my body, float upward and find the psychic dimension he had
described. There, one of my father's dissociated alters would lean
over, kiss me goodnight, turn out the light, and leave the room.
Meanwhile, down below in the `real world,' another alter would be
triggered to enter my body. This alter (who I will now refer to
as `me' or `I') would then be led to the basement where electric
shock equipment had been set up, and laid on an old wooden table with
a bare bulb burning overhead. As I stared at the lightbulb's vivid
burning wire, my genitals would be gently stimulated, triggering a
state of arousal. I would then be shown a picture of a five-pointed
star.
"Do you want to be a star?" my mother would ask. Stars were
beautiful. They were white and pure and faraway. Who wouldn't want to
be a star instead of a human body? "Yes, I want to be a star," I
would reply.
"You can be a star," my mother would say. "Just a second of pain, and
then you'll be a star."
"Up Up Up Up Up," my father would cue, then apply shock to my
genitals. Still in a state of arousal, I would leave my body as
conscious sexual energy and travel upward to the `fifth dimension' �
the dimension past God, where the stars and planets lived. In this
dimension, I felt no pain, only sexual arousal; but a pain barrier
had been created between my `star self' and my body � the memory of
the electric shock that had been applied to my genitals. If my star
self wanted to return to my body, or my body wanted to retrieve the
energy and consciousness that had been imbedded in this particular
star self, either one would first have to pass through the painful
shock barrier that had been erected between them.
As I grew older, I was shown pictures of familiar and unfamiliar
constellations and programmed to store star selves in patterns at
different frequencies. Eventually many universes were created,
including color stars and color universes. Planets inhabited by
systems of alters became another means of storage. I was also shown
pictures of spaceships and told to `send' myself to them. Alters who
ran these spaceships controlled the alters living in stars and
planets, and reported to `earth' or in-body alters, who then reported
outside the body to trainers. Many of these `outer space' alters
traveled between planets and spaceships in `beams of light,' and some
looked like aliens. Star Trek imagery has been heavily incorporated
into intelligence cult programming.
End Part I, Part II follows
(Beth Goobie is the author of 15 books of fiction and poetry. Her
three books concerning cults are The Only-Good Heart (fiction,
published by Pedlar Press, Toronto, ISBN 0-9681884-1-9), Scars of
Light (poetry, reprinted in 1999 by NeWest Press, Edmonton, ISBN 0-
920897-73-8), and The Colours of Carol Molev (fiction for young
adults, published in 1998 by Roussan Publishers, Montreal, ISBN 1-
896184-40-5). She has won the Pat Lowther Memorial Award for poetry
and has been short-listed for the Governor-General's Award for
Children's Literature. In 1998, she was awarded the Joseph S.
Stauffer Award by the Canada Council.)
http://www.paranoiamagazine.com/Goobie.htm
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